Our first year of marriage was rainbows, hearts, butterflies, unicorns and glitter, etc. Our "honeymoon phase" lasted the whole year! We even celebrated in the happiest place on earth! [And if I ever get back to real time blogging, I'll prove that with a whole post dedicated to Disney. Stay tuned, but don't hold your breath!] However, when we made it over the one year mark, I swear that glitter turned into bombs dropping from the sky, the hearts were broken, the butterflies flew away and I didn't know if I'd ever see another unicorn. I am trying to be funny here, because at this point you might as well laugh as to cry. Seriously.
I should have known that 2017 was going to be rough when I had the flu (for the first time ever in my life!) on New Years Day. In February, my dad had some tests done and in late March we found out that he had prostate cancer. Thankfully, he will make a full recovery, treatment went well, surgery went well, and prognosis is great! What an amazing example of how when you call upon the Lord for healing, he answers. It wasn't easy news for any of us to take, and seeing him weak and more tired that usual was difficult during the radiation. Doctors sure know a lot and medicine has come a long way, but Jesus is the ultimate healer, and so far he has done His thing!! Praise, for sure!
On April 3rd, Will lost his job. Again, the details are not what is important, and the internet is surely not the place I want to share the details of this circumstance. He and I both accepted personal responsibility for this unfortunate outcome. However, here is what I learned: if you think something is a conflict of interest, it probably is! Also, greed is a sin hard to recognize. I was greedy, and I didn't even realize it. I thought I was "living right." I certainly wasn't doing anything illegal, or unethical or immoral. Greed is a selfish sin and you may be greedy and not even realize it until means are taken away from you. Then it smacks you in the face.
While all this was occurring, I was trying to sell my townhouse that I had before we got married. There was drama with the renter, there was drama with selling it, there was drama with the inspection. It was just a steady ride on the struggle bus for the month of April. I was also applying and interviewing for jobs, as was Will. AND I was committed to substituting long-term through the end of the school year so June 1, basically. #teacherlife #endofschoolyearcrazy So for May we punched our ticket to ride the struggle bus again. I had 3 interviews, one of which deserves it's own blog post because it was seriously a train wreck. I never got an interview for the position that I really wanted. And I basically became disheartened in finding a job in the school district. Y'all I applied to like five jobs, four of which I never got an interview. Meanwhile, Will is applying to jobs and going on interviews and then never hearing anything back. SUPER frustrating!! Also, another idea for a future blog post: Employer etiquette.
Anyways... June began and I started my summer gig of keeping two elementary aged girls. #nannylife #bestlife My parents went to Colorado, we kept the dog. We took on redecorating our guest bedroom because I had already purchased the paint, etc. to complete the project before the chaos happened. I'd say we were getting off the fast paced struggle bus and boarding a struggle boat. It is summer after all. I was beginning to think I'd gotten a hold of some bad ju-ju, and needed to feng-shui our house to get rid of it. However, I realized that if there weren't apparent struggles in this life we wouldn't need heaven. If God didn't give us obstacles, how could we ever build our faith. Think Ninja Warrior obstacles. If those men and women didn't train to run the course, they wouldn't even be able to get through the first obstacle. They train and build their muscles, tone their body, set their mind and then they run the course, making it look super easy and giving me unrealistic expectations as I sit in my recliner, eating ice cream, while watching, thinking I should do that. Or at least walk around the block. Anyways, my point is, that we can't live a life that is all hearts, unicorns, and glitter all the time. We have to have peaks and valleys so that we can appreciate what God has blessed us with and lean on Him when the road ahead seems to dark to take another step.
Thankfully, July has a new tone. I'm excited to say that Will has a new job and I have a new part-time job with the school district. God answers prayers. He hurts when we hurt, but we have to trust that His timing is perfect. I was in such shock the day Will lost his job, a panic really, a million questions and scenarios running through my mind. I wanted to go back and change things, I wanted it to be me it happened to, I wanted him to find another job the next day. None of that was possible. I had to wait and be patient to what the Lord was going to provide for us. I think as hard as the past few months have been, we are better for it. There were some bad bad days where we didn't even want to speak to each other. There were other days where we had to depend on each other because in the end that's all we had. Our marriage is stronger because of this, and I'm not naive enough to think this will be the only hiccup we ever experience, because it won't be. Heck, we're in our early 30s with no kids... let's be real, this is probably the easiest it's ever going to be!
I can remember hearing other people tell their faith story at church or various other places and I remember thinking, "how did you let your life get to that point?" Well, now I know. Sometimes you don't do anything to purposely get there, you just some how wind up there. All you can do once you're there is put your trust in Him. I was working one day and fixing the girls' lunch and I noticed their spice rack on their counter top. I browsed over it and noticed a jar full of mustard seeds. They aren't all the same size, but they are all pretty tiny. I shook a few out in the palm of my hand and was reminded of Matthew 17:20. With faith the size of a mustard seed, nothing is impossible. I knew that God had a plan to take us through this trial, and I needed to have enough faith that He could do it in His perfect timing and way, and He has.
I know this post was long, and wordy and preachy and hopefully a little funny. But I hope it serves as a reminder to you to have Faith, no matter the circumstance, God will see it through. Thank you to our friends, our Sunday school class and our family for praying along with us. Your encouragement was joy to us even on the dark days. We are excited to learn what God has to teach us through these new experiences, but trust that He paved the path to these new positions and we are to take them on with the confidence we have in Him.
